060. It Is a Very Small Light
「...... Wh-What are you saying? Yuuto.」
Nora muttered with a stunned expression on her face.
「I'm prepared for it, or how should I put it ― I'm feeling 'pretty crazy' myself, and the reason I wanted to become a fixer - a buster - in the first place was 'to become someone who can protect the people I care about'. But」
「On the other hand, if you ended up becoming a being that hurt people you care about.......so that's what you mean, huh」
「As expected from my buddy♪」
I said it with a smile, but Lilyza, seeing this, shouted, "Don't be silly!".
「Why ...... Why do we have to do that!」
「Of course―But, I'm "asking" you to do this because I care about you all and trust you with all my heart. Of course, as Lilyza said, I'm sorry to impose on you all this trouble――」
「That's not it! That's not what I'm talking about!」
I lost my voice in surprise when she grabbed me by the chest.
「Why...why are you making a face like you've given up! It's like... You make it sound like you want to die!」
「I didn't mean it that way, though― it's just...」
I gently untied Lilyza's hands.
「The reason I like sex is――It's partly because "it feels good", partly because "it's fun", but more than that, it's because "it's very calming"」
I've shared my bedroom with many women in my life, and I've never once had a bad feeling about it.
「How should I put it? Only when I have sex with a woman, I can sleep well in the true sense of the word――I can be at ease without thinking about anything else. Maybe it's because I'm a "lonely person" myself.」
For whatever reason or circumstance, one day I was suddenly transferred to this world without any question.
I was forcibly separated from my parents, my friends, and everything I had ever known ...... and in the end, I was thrown out.
I still vividly remember the events of that time, and I don't think I could forget it even if I tried.
I was literally left alone in the "world" and it is simply a "miracle" that I was able to survive.
「But right now, I am transforming into an existence that could destroy from the bottom up everything I have worked so hard to build up. If I can't stop it,......」
「――Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! I don't want to hear it anymore!」
「Me too!」
Lilyza and Nora both vehemently rejected the idea, but
「...... Lilyza. Nora」
I hugged them both lightly and kissed each of them. And then.
「Just a little is enough. Calm down. I'm sorry for the way I said it, but ...... it doesn't mean I've given up or become desperate, you know?」
When I said that, both of them had tears in their eyes and a blank look on their faces, and said, ""Huh?""
「I mean, I don't want to be killed by you guys either, and the reason I went to the trouble of asking you for advice was"What should I do? To ask you to lend me your wisdom and strength", you know?」
Uncontrollable power is indeed frightening.
But if you can control it, there is no problem.
Even if it is something that could destroy the world.
「But at present, I have no clue. If "I do nothing", I will surely be doomed in the not-too-distant future. How can I make sure that doesn't happen?――I've been thinking about that」
「Well, it doesn't seem like it's a problem that one person can handle alone.」
「Yeah, and besides......I know this may be annoying, but please help me. If there is anything I can do, I will do it.」
With that, I bowed deeply to everyone. Then
「――Hee. "Anything"?」
It was Barbara, who had been waiting for a short distance away, who said this in a suspicious voice.
「I get the situation, and I think Yuuto's attitude is admirable. I also feel preparedness, and I certainly don't think it's a problem that can be left unattended. But ― aren't you all lucky?」
「Wh-what's lucky?」
Lilyza said.
「Because it's a rare chance to have someone like Yuuto who will 'do whatever you say' if you help him solve the problem, don't you think? I don't know about everyone else, but at least I was going to help Yuuto from the beginning and I wasn't going to ask for anything in return, though」
「Eh?」
「I know it's only been a few days since I started working with you guys, but I still consider you "comrades" and I want to help those who are suffering and need help, just like you do! If we are "comrades" above all, why don't we help each other in times like this?」
「She's right, you know? To be honest, you're a bit reserved, Yuuto♪」
「......Right. Barbara is right.」
「Osada-kun―Nora, too.」
「In any case, now that you've confided in us, we'll do our best to help you! Yuuto, you just hang in there. You're the one who is hard right now, aren't you?」
「W-well... maybe you're right, but..」
「How is it really? Is it really too much to bear?」
Nora asked me, and I calmly looked back at myself and said
「...... I can handle it a little. In some cases, if I 'handle it alone,' I might be able to postpone it a bit」
It was quite embarrassing to say 'masturbate' in front of three girls, and I thought to myself, "What a stupid thing to say," but thinking about it, I don't remember having handled it on my own since I came to Elfaria.
「So? What are we supposed to do in the end?」
「In the first place, is it really caused by [Soul Steal]? Can you prove it?」
「Besides - if we take it as 'abnormal sexual desire', I think Yuuto was bottomless from the very beginning, though?」
「Now that you mention it, I've heard that a normal human being can empty out after two or three releases in a night.」
「B-But in Yuuto's case...」
While Lilyza and the others were expressing various opinions, only Barbara seemed to be thinking about something with a serious expression on her face. Then, she said
「Hey, Yuuto. If you trust me, there are a few things I'd like to try.」
I was told, "What do you want me to do?" I asked.
「I know it's dangerous,...... but I want you to go into the forest with Osada-kun and use your force to the limit to defeat a demonic beast.」
「I don't mind that, but――why?」
「It's just an idea, though, I think you may be suffering from "excessive force disorder".」
「Excessive force disorder?」
「Yes. Simply put, I think that for some reason or another, the vessel of the body is about to overflow with the contents of the force」
「Ah, I see.」
It is certainly worth a try.
「But ― on the other hand, there's also the fear that it might starve and become easy to run out of control, isn't there?」
「Of course that's possible, but in that case, I have a "force potion," and I have some ideas on how to handle a sexual outburst, so don't worry♪」
「D-don't tell me――Barbara. Are you going to sacrifice yourself?」
Lilyza said.
「I won't do that. I don't dislike Yuuto, but I do think he's a good man, and I've been through a lot myself. Since I have received "Divine Protection from Felicia-sama" if Yuuto rapes me, there will be a literal "Divine Punishment" and Yuuto will cease to exist in an instant.」
「What? Are you serious?」
When I said it, Barbara said, "Yes♪" with a cute smile on her face.
「Which means ― if I hadn't been able to control myself at that moment...」
「...... You would have disappeared long ago without leaving a speck of dust」
I'm amazed at how I was able to stay on my feet in that state.
「Also, I'm sorry to all of you, but ...... I don't think we can handle the 'worst-case scenario' on our own. Yuuto in particular may be unwilling, but I think my sister needs to know about this.」
「That's ......」
Although I feel I have no choice, depending on the situation, I may be constrained from above and made to be a pawn or weapon to be used as they wish. But,..
「I can only talk about it now ― but trust me. I will take responsibility and do something about it.」
I stared at Barbara in silence for a while, as she said with a pure look in her eyes.
「All right. I'm sorry, but I'm counting on you. And Lilyza and Nora――and Osada-kun, too.」
After saying this, they all shook their heads, and I headed into the forest with Osada-kun, ready to go.
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