Chapter 13 Part 1
TLN: Sorry, I cut this chapter into 2 part
「...... This place? What about that snake monster? Am I alive?」
While Hazuki was healing, a red-haired woman who was lying in bed ― Julis ― woke up and mumbled in a muffled voice.
The extent of Julis's injuries was so severe that it was determined that healing, which consumes physical strength, should not be done until she wakes up, and she was left lying there with bruises all over her body.
「Don't move yet. I mean, you're in no condition to move.」
When Julis tries to get up, Mars stops her by her left arm, which is still intact and drops her on the bed.
Even though her broken bones had healed, there was no way she could move since she had just been hit by a huge trailer, so to speak.
「You were that time ......! Then we're in the treasury! Get me out of here, I must hurry to Kruse-sama!」
「Don't get cocky. You almost died just a few minutes ago.」
Lilia lightly chops Julis's brain as Julis forces herself to get up again.
In Lilia's hand is a bowl of porridge. It was made for Julis just after she was injured.
「A slave of a different race is trying to give me an opinion! And now you're violent at me! You long-eared!」
「I am not your slave, and besides, we saved your life. Shouldn't the first thing you say when you open your mouth be "Thank you"? ――Do you have a short temper as well as your ear?」
――Oh, this is what I call a dog and monkey relationship!
The cool-versus-cool scheme creates cold sparks between Lilia and Julis.
「L-Let's not fight, okay!? A-All right, let's eat porridge together, Julis-san! Lilia's cooking is delicious!」
「It must have been poisoned. They must be poisoning him. You people are so hostile to Kruse-sama.」
Julis glares at Mars.
Her slit eyes are cool and beautiful with long eyelashes.
「There's no way I'd do that. And if I was going to kill you, I wouldn't have helped you in the first place.」
「That's right! It's a little light and there's no meat in it, but it's delicious!」
「It would be a different dish if it had a strong flavor and meat in it. It is plain porridge because it is quickly digested and absorbed. It has to nourish the body quickly. ――If you want to get to that prince as soon as possible, you should get yourself well quickly.」
「Right-right. You're going to have to eat a lot to survive the healing process. After all, whether you heal fast or not depends on your own stamina.」
「No need. I'm leaving right away. ――Thank you for your help.」
With a face that seems expressionless and shows signs of anger, Julis continues to throw her gaze toward the wall.
Then Nemu brings more food on a plate. She opened the bedroom door with her foot.
She is munching on something, obviously eating something.
Lilia sighs and says in an accusatory tone.
「――Nemu, didn't I warn you not to eat with your fingers? You promised me that we would all eat together.」
「Mugu...... N-Nemu didn't do it-nya. Nemu didn't eat not only her share but also Hazuki-nyan's share-nya.」
After swallowing something with a gulp, her tail wagged from side to side and her eyes swam, Nemu explained everything.
Mars realizes that the reason Nemu didn't come over to this place was because she was snacking while Lilia was here, who should have finished cleaning up after the cooking, and he laughs uncontrollably, returning to a straight face with a pain in his whole body.
「Eh, you ate my portion too?!」
「――P-poison-nya! Nemu just checked to see if it was poisoned-nya!」
「Was it delicious?」
「The meat was so delicious-nyaa!」
「You're eating well! My meat is ......!」
With a start, Nemu realized that Hazuki had set her up.
She had eaten only the main dish.
「Depressed-nya? Nemu will give you her grass instead of meat-nyaa」
「Leaves won't replace meat. ......!」
「Eat your vegetables too. Did you leave them again?」
「Because it doesn't taste good-nyaa. That's for horses to eat-nyaa」
In this world, not only Mars, who comes from a farming family but also Lilia, who grew up in the forest, loves vegetables.
However, Hazuki and Nemu are extremists who call vegetables leaves and grass. Since they come from a desert area, their diet tends to be meat-based.
If you look closely, you can see that the only thing on Nemu's plate is a salad that has been strangely torn into small pieces.
Since there is only porridge and salad, it is a disappointing set meal, as if tonkatsu had been removed from the tonkatsu set meal.
This is the kind of exchange that takes place every day, but Julis on the bed was watching this scene with rounded eyes. She looked as if she had seen something unbelievable.
「Those ears and tail ...... Are you, Nemu ......?」
「That's right, nyaa? Did you bump your head and forget about Nemu-nyaa?」
「No, it's not that,......it's just that you're so different from the Nemu I know.」
If you compare it to the time when Mars met Nemu, she was a different person in a different guise.
She had regained the appearance of the beautiful girl she had always been and was more fleshy than when she had been extremely unhealthy.
She bathed every day and ate a little too much.
She was sleeping well and had her first mating season.
Simply put, Nemu had become more mature.
Of course, there is not much difference in the contents of her body, but she is in a growth phase, and her feedback on her living condition is rapid.
「When you eat a lot of food, you get more energy-nyaa. That's why Julis eats a lot-nya. Nemu made this-nya!」
「Ah, ahh ...... that, what the, it's well torn(?)」
Nemu holds out a plate of salad in front of Julis's face, and Julis accepts it and expresses her opinion.
Only Mars and Lilia can cook properly, and Hazuki and Nemu help out.
Julis had just adamantly refused to accept charity, and she was looking a little uncomfortable.
「Let's eat and rest now. We'll figure out the hard stuff later. A dungeon is a physical challenge no matter how far you go.」
「............Thanks for the food」
「Okay, that's good. Then let's all eat together.」
Lilia must be planning to eat here, too, since she went to the trouble of having Nemu bring a plate of food.
Even though she was not yet able to move, it was thought that Leia was wary of Julis, who was, in a manner of speaking, a hostile force.
「But my meat ......」
「――I've already assumed that Nemu will snacking. It also means that she will eat Hazuki's share. Therefore, I have prepared it separately, and I've left some in the pot.」
「Lilia-san ......! I'll follow you for the rest of my life!」
「Nemu ate that too-nya.」
「Why did you do that?!」
「Pfff ......!」
All turned to Julis because they heard a giggle escape from her.
Julis was caught by the attention and turned her face away.
「Nemu has never seen Julis laugh before-nya. ......you always look so angry.-nyaa.」
「I-I am not angry at all. My behavior leads to Kruse-sama's evaluation. That's why I try not to show it.」
Lilia nodded.
He guesses Lilia agrees with Julis because she always says the same thing to Hazuki and Nemu.
「If the person you're with is angry, you're not going to like that person, nya?(?)」
「Dignity is important.」
「Well, don't worry about that in front of us. Just be loose as usual.」
As they begin to eat with the order of Itadakimasu, Julis looks at Mars curiously.
「Do you eat the same food as the slaves?」
「Eh, of course, but? It's not economical to make them separately, and they're all my family, so of course, we'll eat the same food.」
Hazuki shares Lilia's, and they all sit around a small table.
Nemu had eaten first, so she was forced to eat only the leftover salad, which she didn't like.
Naturally, Mars ate the same thing. She did not seem to be satisfied with that.
「Either it's a commoner's feeling, or ...... Either way, you're an odd one, you know that?」
「My name is Mars Irving. Oh, I haven't introduced myself. Sorry about the other day. The elf girl is Lilia and the dark-haired one is Hazuki-chan. About Nemu-chan, you already know her.」
「I am Julis Howe. ――Then, Mars. I have a few questions. What happened to each of my companions and the supplies I had with me?」
「...... they're wiped out. Only Julis is alive. The supplies burned up along with the undead」
「I knew it, ...... Err, I know it's an unreasonable request, but would you be willing to let me accompany you even halfway? I must catch up with Kruse-sama no matter what.」
「I don't mind, though? Besides, I couldn't leave you alone.」
There is no way she can be thrown out into the dungeon alone and make it back alive.
Mars thought that once she got involved, she was no longer a stranger.
「With this, Julis is one of us-nya! You gave me a fish before, so Nemu'll give you this grass instead-nya!」
「Eat it yourself! Or you'll never grow up!」
「If I eat vegetables, will my boobs get bigger too!?」
Julis smiles again as she sees the three of them start to make a fuss.
This time, her expression was calm, as if she had lost some venom.
「――Seeing you guys makes me feel like a fool for living with act to a stiffy.」
「I'm aware that we don't feel like an adventurer. But it's fun, and this is what we're here for.」
「You think this time of fooling around is your purpose?」
「I'm a coward. ...... I want to live peacefully like this with everyone. I want to spend a peaceful and uneventful time with everyone. That's why I want to live as long as Lilia does. I came to the dungeon because I thought I might be able to get it from the 【Forbidden Magic Books】.」
Mars knows it is ridiculous from a third party's point of view.
Julis, who follows the prince around, would probably snicker at this.
Mars thought so, but when he saw Julis's unexpected reaction, he felt as if he had seen the heart beneath Julis's iron mask.
She looked surprised, and her young face looked as if it was about to burst into tears at any moment.
Julis, who is older than Mars with the body of a seventeen-year-old, looked as if she were an infant.
Mars was only saying that he thought that if he told her his purpose, they would cooperate with each other in times of need and give Mars the 【Forbidden Magic Books】 that he wanted.
「Your slaves are cherished, right. ......」
「Did you understand what it meant when I said to that prince, 『Don't mix with lowlifes like you』?」
「――And that's what Kruse-sama wants, too.」
「He seemed to me to be a man for whom the word "peaceful" was not even a suitable word, though?」
Julis, who suddenly began to become vague, did not return a single word of Lilia's statement, as if she had not really intended to say what the prince wanted.
For a long time after that, Julis did not utter a word as if she was pondering something.
◇
――The group is well organized, even though the master is not using his authority.
Not because they are following instructions because he is giving them instructions, but because they are each trying their best to achieve the same desire?
Julis was feeling restless as she watched Mars and the others from the bed.
The loose air made her mind buzz, making her wonder if she had been wrong so far.
Julis's idea of the best form of a group is one in which a strong leader decides everything.
If only those who are spontaneous are in charge, the group will collapse.
She was painfully reminded of this during the first dungeon attack.
And yet, each individual on Mars and his group has a strong will.
「Hazuki-chan, please do the math here. I want you to find out how many more days of food we have, including Julis-san's.」
「You got it! Let's also account for Nemu's snacking! If you double my share, I think the number will be close.」
「I might eat more, but nya......?」
「I said no!」
Sitting on the floor, Mars was organizing maps, supplies, and a list of monsters they had encountered; next to him was Hazuki, who was calculating numbers at a tremendous speed as if obsessed; and Nemu, who was rolling around on a giant stuffed fish toy specially made by Hazuki, was at the foot of the bed with Julis.
It seemed that they were not being watched but were gathering around Mars, which was injured and unable to move satisfactorily.
After watching the scene for a while, Lilia enters the bedroom.
As Julis sees it, it is Lilia who is really in power.
「Nemu, don't put out the laundry inside out.」
「Meow? It's troublesome-nya!」
「Master also had a sock turned inside out. Please be careful from now on.」
「S-sorry.」
「Hazuki is only good at this sort of thing.」
「Eh heh heh!」
「The way you laugh is gross.」
「After being praised, I was dumped!?」
Lilia, who is supposed to be a slave, raises her eyebrows at her master and complains bitterly, while her master, Mars, bows his head in honest apology.
If Julis did the same to Kruse, a whip would surely fly.
「Julis is not well-nya? Do you want to borrow this-nya? It's soft and comfortable-nya」
「No, thanks. That's yours.」
「That's right-nya. Before, Nemu only has her name, but-nya? Now she has this dress, this fish, and even a spoon just for Nemu-nya. She just got this stylish one, too-nyaa!」
Slyly crawling up on the bed and approaching Julis, Nemu shows her the magic pendant that Mars had given her earlier. The head was in the shape of an old man's face.
What a bad-taste item, Julis thought every time she saw it, a common magical item.
Every piece by this maker has the same face engraved on it.
「That's not fashionable. It's just a practical item. ......」
「Nyaa...... this is not fashionable-nya?」
「N-no, it's just not to my taste. ...... I think it's fashionable!」
Julis hurriedly mended her frown as she looked slowly sad.
Up until now, Julis have treated her as a slave in their camp, so she doesn't know how to deal with Nemu, who is no longer so.
Julis personally did not dislike Nemu.
The prejudice against different races itself is not actually present in Julis. She just reads the air because everyone says so, and she even has a kind of respect for different races that have radicalized characteristics.
Both the elves, who are potentially skilled with bows and magic, and Nemu, who is a fifteen-year-old girl but has more physical ability than a human, seem superior to her.
That is why she gave Nemu a fish on the day that was supposed to be her birthday.
She also felt as if Nemu were her younger sister.
She was also a slave who had been particularly abused by Kruse.
In short, she acted out of guilt.
「Is Nemu having fun now?」
「She's having so much fun-nya! Nemu likes to slap Hazuki-nyan's butt-nya. It makes a nice sound and a strange voice-nya. Nyahaha! Nemu just wants to slap Hazuki-nyan when she remember-nya! Isn't Julis having fun-nya? You get along well with Kruse-nya.」
「Please don't hit me too hard!」
Hazuki, a girl with a bullying attitude, complains to Nemu.
They don't seem to be on bad terms with each other from what Julis can see.
From Julis's point of view, Hazuki seems to be a rather strange person.
「It's not that Kruse-sama and I are not getting along. We don't have that kind of relationship. I am just a tool.」
「If you know that much, why don't you come with us? I'm not saying you'll be happy here, but at least I won't treat you like a tool.」
「It doesn't matter if I'm a tool. As long as I can be there for him.」
――no one can understand this feeling.
It is a miracle that I, as an orphan, can be with the future king.
No matter what Kruse thinks of Julis now, the promise he made that day is true.
The weakness that the strong showed only to herself, the proof that she alone is special.
She still doesn't know the meaning of her birth, but she certainly has a reason to live.
――I have not yet been abandoned.
If that is the case, what she needs is rest, and Julis falls asleep in high spirits.
「You're feeling much better. The swelling all over your body seems to have almost completely gone away.」
「.......Thanks to you. I can use healing magic myself. ――You're not going to sleep? They all fell asleep. He's really not suited to be an adventurer, falling asleep in front of a potential enemy, this man is」
Mars and Hazuki had fallen asleep sitting on the floor, leaning against the bed. Nemu was curled up asleep at the foot of the bed with a stuffed animal in her arms.
「I stayed up to have a little talk with you. Of course, I am sleepy.」
Lilia, the elf, speaks in a mysterious manner that seems to contain a hint of mystery and points out the outside of the bedroom.
I guess she means to talk to me in a different place.
Lilia is the only one in the group who does not hide her hostility toward Julis.
She is likely trying to eliminate the outside enemy while her master is sleeping.
Julis has lost her weapon, but she knows how to fight.
She was sure that Lilia, who is not a fighter by the looks of her, can defeat her, and Julis follows her lead.
「Why are we taking a bath ......?」
「I'm tired today. And I know you are tired and dirty too. Here, we won't be interrupted in our conversation. The presence of Hazuki and Nemu will inevitably make the air more relaxed.」
Lilia, thinking she was about to get into a battle, undressed easily.
She has no weapons at all. Even so, as an elf skilled in magic, she is capable of fighting even if she is completely naked.
「I don't care. I'm not going to be that charitable, and I don't trust you.」
「Honesty is fine. ―I have no animosity towards you. Of course, I don't like you. But if my master says it's acceptable, I'll go along with it. Now, take off those stinky clothes. I think you can wear Master's clothes because of your height, so I have prepared them for you. As for the underwear, you can wear mine. It is really only the bottom. Please bear with the breasts. I'll wash those too.」
Hiding her exposed, ample breasts with her arms, Lilia shows Mars' clothes in the basket.
Julis can see that her own clothes are in a terrible state, soaked with blood and sweat.
It is no wonder since she has not changed her clothes once since the fierce battle.
「I'll say it again, I have no intention of harming you. I don't want to take your life and make Master hate me. ――I am sure that even you understand that feeling.」
「............」
Julis understand what Lilia means more than anyone else.
In the extreme, she cares more about her master than herself.
If they held the same standards, it was true that it was unlikely that Lilia would harm Julis.
Julis silently follows Lilia into the bathroom.
They left a distance of two people between them, washed their bodies, and did not speak a word to each other until they were in the bathtub.
「You have a beautiful body.」
「.....Are you interested in that side?」
「No, it's not. I mean it as it is. I'm saying you're healthy, without scars, and reasonably fleshy.」
「You are not even a slave, but you are covered in scars. Are you being violated?」
「If there is any blunder, it can't be helped. Well, many of them are due to combat. That man is really a gentleman.」
「I don't think it is kind when there is violence. To a casual observer, that man is an anomaly.」
Lilia runs her fingers through her long, beautiful blonde hair in the bathtub, and her gaze shifts from Julis's face to her body, still.
The comparison makes her feel irresistibly embarrassed.
Lilia's skin has not a single blemish or spot, and her body is voluptuous.
On the other hand, Julis has muscles from fighting and training, and her entire body is covered in scars.
Even her hair is short so that it does not get in the way during battle. Her clothes are so unfeminine that she is more familiar with herself in her armor.
If she was to compare her attractiveness as a woman, she would say that she is completely defeated, and she feels a sense of inferiority.
She wished she could just get rid of being a woman, but she can't give up on the future of being with Kruse.
She feels like self-mocking herself for being halfway as a follower and as a woman.
「Why don't you come to Master―Mars? You don't have to explain why.」
「I know what you mean. That man must be exactly what I saw earlier.」
「Yeah. I don't think it's discrimination, but rather a lack of distinction. He saw elves and humans as the same.」
「What about you? ――Don't you hate humans? It would be more normal to hate them.」
Lilia stares at Julis. Tension runs through the bathroom.
Lilia's sharp eyes relax, and her serious face breaks down into a dumbfounded smile.
「I'm just kidding ――To be honest, I still don't like humans. Humans excluded them because they were of a different race and killed them all. They made a spectacle of the living, inflicting physical and emotional pain on them. I was one of them not so long ago.」
「............」
「――but I also know that not all of them are bad. That many of them have kind hearts. Because the ones I love most are human beings, and ...... the best friends I have are also human beings.」
When she uttered the words "best friend," Lilia's lips moved in a muffled motion and she hid her reddened face by putting it on the surface of the water.
Julis understood that she was probably referring to the dark-haired girl, Hazuki, but she did not know why Lilia was so embarrassed.
「To tell you the truth, the anxiety caused by having you as one of us is more about having more women than being human」
「Women ......? Are you guys also a mistress?」
「So you are in such a relationship with that lowly prince? ―We're not a mistress, you know. In some situations, Mars is more of a lover ......――F-forget it. A-anyway, both parties are in agreement. I'd like to have his children someday.」
Lilia, red again, dived into the hot water up to her nose and bubbled.
Julis was aware that this was a woman who often slipped up when it came to matters concerning Mars.
She is the type of person who talks fast when talking about things she likes.
She seems to get passionate or lose her composure. Julis could tell that she really likes it.
If this kind of thing is cute, Julis doesn't have it.
When she dives into the dungeon, there are no other women, so Kruse's sexual desire is directed toward Julis.
Their relationship has been going on since she was a maid with Kruse.
「You are a slave, but are you going to marry him? That's impossible, isn't it?「
「Master has enslaved me and Nemu to protect us from malicious people. Come to think of it, Nemu is not really a slave, she's just wearing a collar. I don't want to give up this bond, so I keep it. ――I was the first person Master chose. That title holds my heart above all else.」
Watching Lilia slouch around with a happy face makes Julis disgusted.
The way she gives herself over to foolish illusions looks as dangerous as a moth diving into a flame.
――We'll get married someday. Someday, someday, someday .......
Does she take such bedtime stories seriously?
There is no reason for Mars to get married since he is keeping her as a slave.
The status quo is fine. At least that's how she is treated.
She doesn't even know how many times Kruse has said such sweet words to her already.
「You are not calm. You can say anything you want with your mouth. Maybe he just wants to be nice to you guys to curry favor and take advantage of you, don't you think?」
Julis could hear her own voice trembling.
She felt irresistible anger rising in her. She knew it was directed at herself, but she did not stop speaking.
「――You were foolish. I had heard that the race of elves was long-lived and wise, but I guess that was just a rumor.」
She was aware that her tone was becoming harsh, but the words were still coming out of her mouth.
She wanted to blame Lilia. Or, she wanted Lilia to refute her completely.
「――You can't fall in love and still be wise. Rational, irrational, logical, everything is powerless and meaningless. Only the heat that burns you is true. ―I want to believe in the same future because I love him. But that's all. Believe me, it hurts, it could turn out to be.」
When she blurts it out, Lilia rolls her eyes, lets out a small gush, and starts laughing.
There is no tension in the air.
Julis finally understood that this conversation was not between enemies, but rather small talk like that of a courtesan in the royal palace.
「I thought you were a dull woman with a sour look, but you can make jokes like that? ―That's just one suggestion to follow Mars. Perhaps we are so similar in nature that it would not be an easy choice to leave the man you love and move on to another man.」
「S-something like love, I and Kruse-sama don't have that kind of relationship――」
「A word of advice from experience, you should honestly tell someone you like them, got it? For a while, I missed that opportunity. Now that I think about it, I have been in love with Mars since the first time we met. For a while, I didn't know why I decided to follow Mars, but after falling in love with him, I realized that in human terms, it was love at first sight. Incidentally, the synonym in the Elvish language is 『The Final Arrow』」
As the name implies, if you get shot, you're done.
Lilia explained that elves are a single-minded ― and implacable ― race who, once they have decided on a partner, will never change again.
「Well, I'm just saying that sometimes it's happier to stay with someone who cares for you. In any case, you'll be with them for a while, so you can make your decision there. One thing is for sure, that prince left you. Mars rescued you and welcomed you. You must accept that fact.」
It's a fact she doesn't want to remember.
Surely their eyes must have met. But Kruse left Julis as if she were a stone and disappeared.
Now she is the only one left. She lost her companions and everything.
――There is nothing left but the past. I want to go back to that time.
Lilia's eyes are bright as she dreams of the future. They were like the sky on a sunny day.
In contrast, how about myself? Julis is depressed because she feels that she has become dark and muddy, wishing only for the past.
「Sometimes I wonder where I went wrong. No,......, I know what caused it. I'm sure Kruse-sama's reputation among you is terrible. But it is because of an unfortunate incident. Since that day, all beings have turned into enemies and he had stopped opening his hearts to anyone.」
「Incident?」
「Kruse-sama's mother was assassinated. Of course, Kruse-sama himself has been threatened with assassination many times. The royal palace is such a place. Kill or be killed, brother and sister or not, they are just an enemy prepared for you by birth.」
As a child, the only person he could ever trust was his mother, his birth parents.
With the loss of his mother, Kruse was left alone.
It was around that time that an exclusive side of his personality began to emerge.
Julis, who was very young at the time, could not understand the detailed changes in Kruse's state of mind, but now that she is an adult, she understands that he had already begun to break down at that time.
Although it was a common incident in the royal palace, it was not enough to convince the victim, Kruse himself.
He had devoted himself more to his studies, which had been his hobby, trained his body to the point where he was called the best warrior in the country, and achieved a place where he could see the throne even though he was the fourth prince.
She felt as if a refracted hatred was manipulating Kruse as an invisible thread.
Drunk with a sense of duty as a squire and the fervor of his increasingly prosperous power, Julis could not stop Kruse.
No regrets. That is exactly what happened to Julis.
「That is why Kruse-sama wants a position that is not threatened by anyone, and he wants peace. In that sense, Mars and Kruse-sama are the same kinds. The only difference is whether he lives as a king or not.」
「Please don't lump together that one with Mars. How many thousands of people are you going to kill just because one person wished to? Mars would never do such a thing. Pity for pity, but it is no justification for what you are doing now. ――The world is a bunch of lost people, all of them big and small. That prince is too self-aware. He thinks he is special.」
Lilia spoke harshly, with a real sense of reality.
Julis guessed she is right. It is a common tragedy.
Compared to Julis, who never knew her parents, Kruse is blessed.
To put it bluntly, it is favoritism toward the person she loves.
「He will become king and create a peaceful world without conflict. Kruse-sama's hope must not be wrong.」
「――hasn't that dream already been reshaped? I could not sense from the way he acted that he wanted anything other than to be king. Childhood dreams are so vague, aren't they? I think you should live your life thinking about your own happiness. You are not a slave, your life is your own.」
「I am ...... my whole life is ......」
She was picked up, so she belongs to Kruse.
But the owner has disappeared somewhere else.
Now that she has lost her bearings, she feels as if she has been thrown out into the ocean all alone.
「You can fall in love with Mars. What can I say? Being with Mars makes me feel like it's okay to be myself.」
「Become myself ......」
She has always wanted to be the embodiment of what Kruse wants. So there is no such thing as being yourself.
――If I were able to establish myself, would this unspeakable sense of insecurity be resolved?
――Will I cease to be a tool?
What she realized when she first left Kruse was that she was like a puppet.
Now that the strings have been cut, she doesn't even know what she should do.
She lacks the ability to think for herself. She has lived too much as she was told.
――Lilia and Nemu must have lived their lives the same way. And yet, now they are so full of life.
I wonder if I would be any different if I were with that man.
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